Before my thirties, I had met very few people to look towards as an example of what the sacred love shared between only two people should be like. Just before my 31st birthday I met a couple who changed not only my entire perspective, but their loving influence changed my entire life from that point forward.
I met Derek in 2014 when he came to vacation in Rincon, Puerto Rico to visit his family with his best friend Maty. I vibed out instantly with the guys and we all stayed in contact after they left. One year later Derek returned with his new girlfriend, Jade. I have always been “one of the boys” and am used to a variety of reactions that occur when a woman involved with one of my friends meets me for the first time. As soon as someone says, She doesn’t really get along with other girls, I know we will vibe out. Not that I don’t get along with other girls, but I am more likely to find common interests among groups of women who display more male characteristics (which also feels wrong to say because what truly determines “male” vs “female” characteristics except for our own individual opinions?). Derek & I have so much respect for each other and our friendship that we were both nervous of me meeting Jade for the first time. We both wanted everything to go perfectly.
Derek & Jade knew each other growing up through their school years and only began dating each other later in life. They watched each other make mistakes and grow from them. They already knew each other’s past, understood each other’s mood fluctuations, and honored each other’s energy in a way that I had never witnessed before. Derek & Jade were not perfect by any means. They bickered in their sarcastic New York way, spouted out You Never’s & You Always’, and experienced arguments and disagreements that would have sent most couples stomping off in opposite directions. Even their arguments are beautiful to me. There is so much love shown in every action that they take, individually and as a partnership. The lines of Her, Him, and Them are clearly defined. Derek & Jade are so very much their each individual people, and yet also very much one great combined unstoppable force each complimenting the other in such naturally effortless ways.
I quickly became in love with their love and in love with being their “third wheel”. Every visit they make to la isla we cram in as many adventures as possible, swap music until the sun comes up, talk until our voices are raw and laugh so hard our forehead veins pop. For the first time in my life I witnessed a passionate romance and love that made me want to scream out loud “I Want That!”. Every emotion that they displayed between them is done with honesty, love and respect. I want everything that they have, the love, the laughter, the gentle disagreements, the honest opinions, and the complete partnership that they share.
I was waiting oh so patiently for the event that I knew was coming…..the announcement of their engagement! As if that was not enough to shed happy celebratory tears, I learned that they intended to have their wedding here in Puerto Rico instead of New York where they are from and I completely lost my head. But wait it gets better…..the wedding falls on the week of my birthday AND Maty (Derek’s best friend who I met a year before Jade) will be their officiant. I have not seen Maty since we all originally met back in 2014, and I have never gotten the pleasure of enjoying all their company at once. I’m so over the moon happy as can be you would think this wedding was for me!
Since meeting Derek, Maty, and Jade, my eyes have been opened to the endless definitions of love and soul mates. We are raised with the mainstream belief that our life’s purpose is to find our one true love soulmate and live happily ever after. I have loved so many people in so many different ways, for so many different reasons and each experience has brought something necessary into my life. The love that I speak of has nothing to do with sex, but everything to do with passion and connection. I now understand that being loved is just as powerful and necessary as giving love.
I will forever have the biggest couple crush in history for the two people that opened my eyes to a new way of loving and living. This upcoming weekend we will all join together to celebrate Derek & Jade’s wedding in Rio Grande, Puerto Rico. Stay tuned because this will be the first wedding in my life that I have ever looked forward to so I will all full of love and will have beautiful pictures to share later.
I adore this article from Elephant Journal on the Five Types of Soulmates We’ll Meet & Love In Our Lifetimes. Give the article a read if you would like and leave a comment below about any type of love that lifts you up!