Any relationship takes work but long distance relationships do not work if both people are not equally committed. A study by Cornell University revealed that while couples in a “normal” relationship tend to have more daily interactions than couples in a long-distance relationship, the couples who had hundreds of miles in between them tend to have longer, more meaningful conversations. It has been proven that Long-distance couples try harder than geographically close couples in communicating affection and intimacy, and their efforts do pay back. I can honestly say that I am giving more of myself and my efforts than I have ever given any relationship that I have been in, not just because of our distance, but because I know they are TheOne, and all of our efforts are worth it.
Miles apart and Bae keeps repeating “communication is all we have. I think to myself, but we have So much more, we have memories, we have love, we have connection, we have a future. I hear the words loud and clear though, I understand and respect their desire to remain connected through all forms of communication. They are far better than I at living in the present moment and helping me see the value in doing so, more and more every day. I work through my days, party through my nights, but every now and then a stray emotion or three slithers through my barriers and I can tangibly feel our distance. Like a radar inside of me bleeping, reminding me of every single island, wave, mile, and hour we are apart. Most days I suck it up and work my tail feathers off, but the pain of missing My Other Whole feels just as honorable as the beauty of being in love. So I embrace it, and I give them all the communication that they desire while we are apart.
I was gifted with an old fashion soul mate who has high expectations, a penchant for hand written letters and appreciates filter free conversations just as much as I. We are a rare breed. Alas, we are also children of the 21st century. In appreciation of, but not slaves to, the instant gratification that modern technology can provide. I’ll be the first to admit, text messages, audio messages, Snapchat, Instagram, and Facebook have been key contributors to keeping me united with the one I love overseas. There are times that I feel like I can actually Feel MyLove through my iphone. The text bubbles in imessage give me real time, I know they are there. Hand is on their phone, I know exactly how they hold it, palms clasped around the base, thumbs quick at work on the touch screen. The second the message comes through I can picture MyLove’s thumb tapping the blue highlighted SEND with a little smirk on that gorgeous face that I love so much.
There are times that I find myself unable to put my phone down because I have become addicted to seeing notifications coming through my phone, only looking for one name in particular. I can see the text bubbles or the “Is Typing…” notification and I know I am not alone. 3,603 Miles apart yet I feel like my love is right There! As if I could push my finger through my touchscreen and caress their face, feel their touch, smell their scent. I would give anything to do so, but for now, this will have to satisfy. I can feel MyLove through my iPhone.
Anyone familiar with Snapchat knows that things can get real naughty real quick, but you can also get goofy and sentimental. Being in a long distance relationship I can fully understand the benefits of the App, especially with the updated Live Feed feature, similar to FaceTiming. New messaging and video chat features were added to Snapchat allowing users to send text to other users and save text messages by clicking on them. A crucial aspect of the update is the “Here” sign that can subtly appear at any moment as a blue bubble in your chat window. The bubble pulsates softly to inform a user that a friend is also available to engage in a video chat—video chatting (the live feed feature I mentioned earlier) can only occur between users who are concurrently using the app. When the Here button is held down, a live video chat function is immediately launched. Regarding the Here function, Spiegel (Snapchats creator) explained: “The accepted notion of an online indicator that every chat service has is really a negative indicator. It means ‘my friend is available and doesn’t want to talk to you,’ versus this idea in Snapchat where ‘my friend is here and is giving you their full attention.”
Just the sight of the blue button, whether it is pulsating or not gives me comfort that my love is there. Not beside me, and no where nearby, but There where ever that may be. I have their undivided attention for the moment, and I can feel them through my iPhone. For that moment, Nothing else exists but me, my love, that mesmerizing blue pulsating button, and the connection that it gives us. Comfort washes over me and instantly I feel like I can handle this distance between us and anything else that life throws our way. When you find your forever soul mate every thing that you do is worth every effort that you make. I know the long distance will not always be an issue in my relationship, so for now, I am grateful for the technology that I normally take such great pains to avoid.
Until my love is in my arms again, I can feel them through my iPhone.